“I’m willing to give them another chance,” said one former Dunkin’ loyalist. “But if I see even a hint of social justice in my coffee cup again, I swear—I’m switching to Krispy Kreme. They know how to keep politics out of the glaze.”

Only time will tell if Dunkin’ can bounce back from this billion-dollar blunder. Hoffmann remains optimistic, even as the company scrambles to reassure its base that they’ve learned their lesson.

“We got ahead of ourselves. We thought we could be the Starbucks of the working class. But we’re not Starbucks. We’re Dunkin’. And from now on, that’s what we’re going to focus on being. Simple, no-frills, no-politics Dunkin’.”

As Hoffmann wrapped up the press conference, he took one last sip of his coffee—no doubt wondering if it was too late to go back to being just the place where people grabbed a donut on the way to work, without a side of political outrage.

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